Memorial Day Weekend

It has been hard getting back into real life after such a wonderful Memorial Day weekend! For as long as I can remember, Memorial Day has been more than just a day to honor our veterans and servicemen (although I thank and appreciate each of you who give your time and lives to protect our country) but a day to honor and remember loved ones who have passed on, veteran or not. Memorial Day has been a day where we would go to Salt Lake City to see family, and then travel throughout the Utah valley to the various gravesites where loved ones from as far back as I can remember are buried. My mom and dad would buy lots of flowers and would lovingly clean up each gravestone they could and leave flowers for each of their loved ones and would then tell us stories about them. I remember Dad telling me about my great great grandmother who would come and take care of my grandmother as a little girl, my great great great grandparents who saved up money for their daughters to go to America from Norway even though they wouldn't be able to go along and how they never saw each other again, my great uncle and how he said this or my great great aunt and what she would do with my dad when he was a child. We would visit my mother's side of the family and celebrate my grandmother's birthday with a huge party. Each year we did this and it has only been in the past few years that we haven't been able to go as much which is hard because I always look forward to the drives to Heber City, Midway, Pleasant Grove, and Salt Lake City cemeteries and to the stories I would hear about them. Especially because I did family history research before Finch was born while I was at home, I felt the ties of family even stronger this year than ever before.

This year we went to stay with Ben's family in Provo and enjoyed a fun family dinner with his side, and then on Sunday we enjoyed the homecoming of one of my cousins who just got back from Chile. Yesterday, Ben and I went to Heber City and left flowers on the gravesite of my father's parents and then had to head home because we were running late and had a long drive ahead of us. I wish I could have done more and could have visited all of my loved ones. After getting lost and spending twenty minutes searching for their plot, I was grateful to see that my grandparents were doing well and that they had been visited by more loved ones apart from us. If only Jeanne knew there were spiders on her side of the gravestone. She hated bugs of any kind and would have had a fit. We tried to clean everything up and leave it beautiful and touched with love.

Ben and Finch were super tired after a day of driving up to Provo

Did I forget to mention that I was too? :)

Finch in his Sunday best :) He was a bit serious after a day of being held by family he didn't know.

Finch was charming his great grandmother on Ben's side of the family. She loved getting to hold him :)

This was at Doc and Jeanne Mahoney's gravestone (my grandparents on my dad's side)

Now we are back to the hubbub of being new parents and it is hard to think how quickly this last weekend went. I am grateful for the loved ones I got to see and so grateful to see how each of them welcomed my little Finch into the family with so much love. I can't even tell you how many people held him and wanted to be near him. He was so loved and it made my heart warm just to see how the ties of family extend so far. I know that loved ones beyond the veil were there and that many loved ones were there to welcome him when he was born that I couldn't see, and it's holidays like Memorial day that I appreciate the binding ties of family with the gospel. One of the happiest messages I think the LDS church teaches is that of eternal families. I look at my husband and my son, and then at my immediate and extended families and I see that eternal families can and do exist. I think of those who are gone in this world but who are flourishing in the next and I know that they are preparing it for us and are there to help us when we are in times of need.

I am grateful for family and so grateful for the love and friendship that ties us together forever.

Love,

Liz, Ben, Finch and Zola

A month on Friday...

Wow. Now I get it. All those years my mom would tell me to stop growing up and I'd just roll my eyes and try harder to be an adult make sense to me now. As I look at my little boy who is not quite as little as he was a month ago, and as I try to think of where the time has gone, I am drawing a blank. It could be all of that sleep deprivation wiping my short term memory, but I just don't get it. How can time fly so quickly? The nine-ten months of carrying him inside me took forever, but already he will be four weeks old the day after tomorrow. It's not fair.

Looking back on the past month I can't believe the journey we've been on and I am so glad he is a part of my life story now. I loved getting to celebrate Mother's Day as a new mother, and getting to proudly tell people who ask us how old he is when we go out for groceries or for errands. I love this little boy, and with every night that I have to wake up in zombie mode to nurse him, or to comfort him when he's fussy, I wake up loving him more and more. I just can't even begin to describe the love I feel for him that grows each day. And it gets worse everyday to the point that I know I will never get over this love I have for him. And he's growing up already and needs to stop. When he's 35 years old I won't be able to give him hundreds of kisses a day or hold him close to me and I don't want those moments to stop! (Hopefully he'll have kids of his own by then and I can just kiss them ;) ).

Such is the dilemma for every mother I guess. Being at home with him has been a true joy and I thank God each day that I am able to be home with Finch because Ben is able to work the job he does. We are so blessed and I am so grateful for the hours I get to spend with my little one. Being a mommy rocks and I would never change it :)

Love, Liz, Ben, Finch, and Zola :)

Has It Been Two Weeks Already??

Two weeks ago, I was sitting in the hospital as they hooked me up to a Pitocin drip and waiting for my little man to make his arrival. I can't believe it's already been two weeks. In some ways, it feels like he was just born yesterday, and in other ways, it feels as if he has always been with us and that we've always been parents. I love it. I cannot say enough how much I love being a mama. Loving and caring for Finch is like breathing for me and even though I do get tired and overwhelmed at moments, that is life, and I am just so amazed by this incredible little boy and the joy he brings to Ben and I.

His two week check up went great and while he is needing to put on some fat and still has a tiny bit of jaundice, he is doing great. He is such a good baby. People don't believe it when I tell them that he only wakes up about twice a night (maybe three times but that's not as common) and once he's fed and diapered goes right back to sleep and hardly cries. He sleeps like an angel and loves to be snuggled. He is so good, and I feel so blessed.

In the past two weeks I have learned:

1. Finch loves breastfeeding and tolerates the bottle if I have to pump, we had to supplement with formula about three times total while I waited for my milk supply to come in and he doesn't enjoy it at all.
2. He has an incredibly strong suck. Ouch, ouch, ouch.
3. When he gets too hungry, he gets frustrated and spends a lot longer trying to latch. Poor guy, he gets flustered just like his mama when he's upset.
4. Finch hates baths. Honestly, they are kind of sucky until you get to be immersed in the warm water. I'm working on finding a good way to do that while I am still healing up from delivery.

5. Finch can pee anytime, anywhere, and has the power to turn it on and off to his advantage. It is like a water gun, and he is dangerous.
6. I can guarantee that 95% of the time he will pee after I have finished cleaning him up while diapering him. It rarely makes it into the new diaper, but onto the bed, my shirt, Ben, or Finch's little face. Poor guy...poor us.
7. Finch is most alert after a feeding and will get very mature and thoughtful expressions like he is pondering eternity. If only I could hear his thoughts, it is amazing to see the wheels turning behind his eyes :)

8. Kangaroo care rocks and Finch loves it. He loves being held and snuggled and if I hold him, he practically stops crying, whimpering, or being restless and just relaxes.
9.He loves Enya and sleeps through anything if she is playing because I listened to her when I was pregnant with him.
10. I am a Child of God and Away in a Manger are his favorite primary songs.
11. His hands must always be by his face. Don't ask questions, just let him do it.
12. He adores his daddy to no end. He may look like me, but he is definitely his father's son.
13. Just being close to us is all he really needs to be content and happy. He has never been away from us since being born. Apart from a two hour gap when Ben and I ran some errands and Grandma Mary watched him, he has always been close by. I can't stand being away from him.
14. We've only really tried it a couple of times because he is still so small, but he loves babywearing.
15. He is super strong.  His neck muscles are super strong and he almost rolled over the other day. I am in for it once he learns how to use his body more.
16. Already, he smiles and giggles in his sleep. He also makes the Zoolander face with the kissy/pursed lips and the furrowed brow. He is so expressive. I love it!

17. His favorite place to be is snuggled into my chest so he can sleep to the beat of my heart. (rather poetic, isn't it? ;) )
18. He fits nothing. All of his newborn clothes look like they belong on a giant baby, and it is so darling to see how little he is.

19. He is the most brave and resilient baby I have ever met. He is such a trooper and never ceases to amaze me with his incredible strength. During labor, during his blood draws, his circumcision, and more blood draws, he hardly cried and was just the sweetest little guy.
20. I am hopelessly and irrevocably in love with this little boy and I am so grateful I get to be his mama :)
21. He squeaks in his sleep, moans with joy when he gets his b-juice (our nickname for breastmilk), and chirps like a little baby bird when he is talking to us. Let's just say his entire name: Callum means dove/hope, and Finchley pretty much means bird all around.

Love,

Liz, Ben, Finch, and Zola :)